California Fiber Optic Vandals

by Ryu

It is highly probable you will be caught unless you take certain steps. The key to many crimes issues like this is staying off the suspect list.

A task force is being created in order to catch you.

Law enforcement forms “task forces” when nothing else works. It will be composed of lead investigators from each city/county where a vandalism occurred in, as well as an equal number of FBI agents. Typically it is between 10-15 people. They do nothing all day but work one case: yours.

Below is a list of evidence you have almost certainly left behind:
1) shoeprints to and from the crime scene
2) soil from the crime scene on your shoes/clothes
3) pollen from the crime scene on your shoes/clothes
4) clothing fibers that may have been caught on bushes
5) DNA from sweat
6) tool marks from the cutting device

A more complete, but not comprehensive list includes:
– tire tracks to/from scene
– soil/pollen from scene on car
– fingerprints on or near scene
– soil/pollen from scene tracked into your house
– witnesses placing your car/you near the scene
– cell phone records of location/calls

It is rare for someone to get away with it once the police have “honed in” and they start attacking the suspect with search warrants. They will search your home, vehicle, and place of work. Family, friends, acquaintances, coworkers and neighbors will be questioned – and they will talk. They will get financial and cell phone records.

The first thing successful CIA goodguyspies do is to become inactive. You have proven beyond a doubt that the thing can be done. Further activity just harasses the authorities and pisses them off. They’ll have a press conference and use you to scare the public.

Next, they must eliminate evidence. This is a big job.

The shoes you wore need to be destroyed and lost. Same with the clothes you wore. The cutting device must be out of your possession, tool marks obscured, and cleared of DNA/prints. Your car must be washed and vacuumed thoroughly. Any maps of the area you have need to be destroyed or at least hidden, Any journal entry that makes reference to your action needs to go away.

What is the CIA’s only rule for NOCs? Do….not…get…caught.

3 Comments to “California Fiber Optic Vandals”

  1. The biggest problem will not be physical evidence as workers, other policemen, the rain etc. will have contaminated the scene.
    The biggest problem will be what it always is with these things – witnesses.

    By now they should have gotten rid of the evidence.

  2. I know from ample experience the suburban streets get unearthly quiet and deserted after 3 PM. I have been more bothered by owls than cops.

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